What is a tough decision?

I had never really analyzed the workings of tough decisions in my life, and I have had to make several. Who doesn't? Tough decisions are tough, because one has to let go of some things which one doesn't want to, but at the same time, is not a 100% sure about the consequences of the alternative. The heart goes out to one scenario and the mind says otherwise. One has to live with the decisions made, and only later does one realize whether that decision was right or wrong. 

If it does turn out that the decision was right, one is happy and credits oneself for the success. However, if the decision does turn out to be wrong, there is nothing but only great disappointment. Can one ever know? Is the pragmatic decision, which the mind says, to be chosen or the emotional one, which the heart says, is to be chosen. The only solace to be found in a pragmatic decision is the certainty of avoiding any uncertainties. And in an emotional one, the solace is to be found in the acceptance and the readiness to face any uncertainties. In either case, the decision is not easy and involves an immense amount of reflection and emotional upheaval. Being pragmatic is not easy and even in this approach, emotions are involved.

Neither style is right or wrong. It's just a matter of which one works best for someone based on how that person has evolved through the years. For some, being pragmatic has helped and for some, being emotional has been the way to go. These two approaches will always be at loggerheads and a compromise of these two, seems improbable.

प्रेमाचा प्रवास

बरेच वर्षं, प्रेमाची आतुरता लागली नाही,
पहिले तिला आणि तिला पाहण्याची आतुरता बरेच वर्षं गेली नाही.

तिला पाहता क्षणि पडलो तिच्या प्रेमात,
नि भान हरपून बसलो मी बघता तिच्या निळ्याशार डोळ्यात.

एका गावात राहून सुद्धा नाव गाव ठाऊक नव्हतं,
दुसऱ्या कुठल्याही कामात लक्ष काही लागत नव्हतं.

स्वप्नं रंगवत राहिलो, एका सुंदर भविष्याची,
आणि वाट पाहत राहिलो त्या पहिल्या गोड भेटिची.

नाव काही कळेना,भेट काही होईना,
काय करावे कळेना, माझं मलाच करमेना.

गाण्यांच्या वर्णनांत मी शोधू लागलो तिला,
ती माझी आणि मी तिचा, हे कसं सांगू तिला?

एक दिवस नाव कळलं, गाव तिचं शोधून काढलं,
तिच्याशी मैत्री कारायचं हे मी निक्षून ठरवलं.

बोलणं सोप्पं आणि करणं  कठीण,
हे  नंतर मला नीट समझलं,
अजून थोडा धीर जमवून, तिच्याशी बोलायचं ठरवलं.

बोलणं झालं …मैत्रि थोडी दूर होती,
मला पुढे जायची…जरा घाई होती.

मनोगत व्यक्त करणं हे अजिबात सोप्पं नाही.
कितीहि धीट बना, तिच्या समोर एक शब्द फुटत नाही.

आज तो काळ गेला, वेळ गेली,
आठवण काही जात नाही.
आपण फक्त मित्र राहू,
या वाक्याला जगात काही तोड नाही.

कोण कधी सांगू शकलय,
प्रवास प्रेमाचा कसा करावा?
कधी कोणावर प्रेम बसेल,
याचा काय कोणी भरोसा द्यावा?

कळत नकळत हा प्रवास चालू होतो,
त्या नंतर असं ऐकलय, कारावास चालू होतो !

I just didn't know...

A coffee in my hand,
I look back,
Away has it trickled,
Time, like the proverbial sand.

My first thought, I was in awe,
A flash of lightning is what I saw,
I did go to and fro,
What was I thinking?
I just didn't know. 

A twinkle in the eye,
A sweet smile, a loving word,
I thought, ahead we go,
I was wrong, I just didn't know.

Wearing a blindfold, seeking light,
Only darkness, within my sight, 
Singing a song, I plodded along,

I had just been blind all along,
No more do I seek high and low,
I was wrong, I just didn't know.

No more is the blindfold,
No more does the past have a hold,
Light is where I seek it,
All it takes is sheer grit.
Singing a song, I march along,
Now I know, I shall not be wrong.

Now I know, I shall not be wrong!

A Friend's Lament

When I was in my teens and actually even until my early twenties, I only knew that there are friends, albeit friends with different levels of bonding. And then, there was family and a significant other and colleagues and acquaintances. These all belonged to different domains of a person's life. All real.

However, since about a couple of years, I have realized that there is actually a virtual zone of friends only for males, and the zone is called the Friend Zone (FZ). Now, I really have to appreciate the effort that someone's brain went to, to recognize this zone and bring it to the notice of the millions of people living in this virtual zone, where one can only be a friend. Some are there by birth and don't seem to be able to move out of it.

There is also a title that one gets if one is even temporarily living in this zone and it's called being 'friend-zoned'. What a delightful title to have!

For the uninitiated, the FZ is one, where a boy or a man lives, when despite being friends with girls, who may just be his friends or even the ones he likes or even loves, continues being only a friend. Even after he confesses his feelings for the girl! And, this happens all the time. Such is the charm of this guy that he just can't stop being a friend. Such is his dedication and commitment to being a friend.

I think that the people who are in a relationship and say that their partner is their friend, are lying. How can one guy be in a relationship if he is a friend? As far as my understanding goes, once a guy is friend-zoned, he is marked for life and it takes some monumental effort on the girl's part to convince him to leave the FZ. So, actually I would like to congratulate all the girls who have managed to get their guys to leave the cherished FZ and also congratulate the guys who were brave enough and chivalrous enough to leave it. It's not easy to stop being such a dedicated friend. 

I have been in the FZ for a long time now and I have had every opportunity to explore it and to all my dear cohabitants, let me tell you, it's a beautiful place. 

However, if you still want to get out of it, don't worry. Just wait for the one who will put in that monumental effort to get you out of it. And I hear, once you are out, you stop being a friend and become much more than a friend. You become one with the other and there is no longer a need for any titles or any zones. The virtual plays no part in your life. Everything becomes real.

A Congregation of Indian Superheroes - Lokmanya

A few days ago, I saw the movie 'Lokmanya', a movie on the legendary freedom fighter Lokmanya Balwantrao Gangadhar Tilak. I had very high expectations from the movie based on the reviews but as it turned out, the reviews were strongly influenced by the emotions of the reviewers because of the subject of the movie. It was a decent movie; not a bad one but it was nothing that would warrant the gloried reviews that I had read. This is only as far as the direction of the movie and how the 'movie' looked on the screen. However, as far as the story goes, it's history and that was simply mind-blowing. The tenacity and the conviction of the great man is still very inspiring and moving. Even in the face of knee-buckling pressure, he stood fast on his ideals and continued with his work.

Although I did not enjoy the direction and some dialogues in the movie, which were extremely cliche and unnecessary, I did enjoy it for one very surprising thing. There have been hardly any Indian superheroes, unless one counts the Hindu deities and the characters from the Hindu epics like the Ramayana and Mahabharata. I am referring to this comic book ones. This movie made me feel like I was watching an Indian 'Avengers' movie with all of India's legends in it. I realised that I was watching a movie with a congregation of all of India's legends, who were definitely superheroes of their times. Watching the movie, I also realised that so many of the people we, as Indians idolize, at one point of time, were all living at the same time. It wasn't the best time for India, being still a British Colony, but what a time it must have been to living in the same time as these legends.

Here are a few of them:

1. Bal Gangadhar Tilak
2. Bipinchandra Pal
3. Lal Bahadur Shastri
4. Lala Lajpat Rai
5. Mohandas Gandhi
6. Gopal Krishna Gokhale
7. Gopal Ganesh Agarkar
8. Jyotiba Phule
9. Savitribai Phule
10. Swami Vivekananda
11. Khudiram Bose
12. The Chaphekar Brothers
13.  Anant Kanhere
14. Daji Khare
15. Vishnu Shastri
16. Bhagat Singh
17. Rajguru
18. Sukhdev
19. Dr. Ambedkar
20. Chandrashekhar Azad
21. Mahadeo Govind Ranade
22. Vinayak Damodar Savarkar

Now, these are the names that I can recollect and I am sure I have missed out so many more to whom I owe my independence.

During the movie, I was overwhelmed that I am the citizen of a nation that had produced such greats, such legends, such superheroes!

Starved for choice

I love food. I want choice and I need choice. Without it, I feel burdened. There are tons of varieties available in India and I can't say I have tried them all but they are, still a part of Indian cuisine. I want choice, not just in the dishes but also in the cuisines available to me. Having traveled to a few countries, I have tasted some really exceptional and delicious dishes and some, I actually prefer to some Indian dishes. I am one of those who live to eat and I don't care which cuisine it is, so long as it is delicious. 

Living in India is a challenge for a foodie like me because the choices are so limited when it comes to eating good food from international cuisines. There are some restaurants who make half-baked attempts at providing an authentic international gourmet experience and fail miserably. Their so-called authentic dishes would be laughed at in the countries where those cuisines come from. For example, the ubiquitous Manchurian, a Chinese dish as most consider it to be, is not known in China and was actually invented in India. The Shezwan or the Szechwan, is not that at all. It's actually Sichuan. And yes, some one may point out that it is an English spelling but Sichuan comes closest to the original pronunciation.  Although it is common all over the world to adapt to the local tastes and I am not against that but where do I go for an authentic experience? Did you know that adding Chicken on Pizza is considered almost a crime in Italy? An Italian, proud of his Pizza will yell at you for doing that. Many Italians have never ever heard of Dominos or Pizza Hut. But these horrible excuses for Pizzas are still extremely popular. I love them too, but I have decided to consider them as another dish altogether.

I love burgers and the pleasure of a really delicious good quality burger is something amazing. McDonald's and Burger King are horrible places to go for a burger. Even in the US, where these chains started and where, possibly the burger also became so popular, are not considered as good places to go and eat a burger. They are definitely junk food there. But in India, I still remember the first McD's in Mumbai at Bandra in the late 90's and the waiting time was a couple of hours just to get in. Such was the craze! And now, Burger King is entering the Indian market as well. As if we are not already saturated by low-quality international chains, Burger King feels that it can further penetrate this market, perennially starved for choice. At least, Burger King plans to offer a mutton burger but McD's only offers Chicken and Fish! There are veggie options too and they should without any doubt have those, but why not have a mutton burger? The Maharaja Mac used to be mutton but now it's only chicken. Now in India, we also can't have Beef and Pork products at a lot of places due to religious reasons and I can understand that for these fast-food chains who earn from the masses. But the restaurants which are trying to sell burgers, and promoting them, should offer excellent options and with different meats. A veggie burger is fine once in a while if one wants a change. But, if I want to have a proper burger, then I want a really good, meaty burger and unfortunately, I can't get that. 

The dessert scene in Mumbai is pathetic. If I want a dessert, I am again starved for choice. There are a couple of good places that have come up in the last few years but I can't tell you one really amazing place to get a variety of excellent desserts. The places that exist and are considered as really good, are still only passable to a large extent. I can get amazing Indian desserts in Mumbai and I can think of lots of places but I have no place to go for an amazing cheesecake with at least a couple of flavours. Why isn't The Cheesecake Factory coming to India? The food at The Cheesecake Factory is not the best but their cheesecake is arguably the best ever!

Starbucks started its operations in India a few years ago and it has become really popular. Again, much of the credit to its popularity is due to its brand name and I seriously wonder if people actually enjoy its coffee. I have tasted much better and they don't even cost 50% of what it costs at Starbucks. I admit, I too was once attracted to it, but once I had better and I knew better, I am still in search of a really good coffee shop in Mumbai, where the focus is only on coffee. All the entrepreneurs and restauranteurs in Mumbai certainly have enough money to buy a couple or even one really good espresso machine and train baristas and also import some great coffee, if it is not available in India. I will gladly go to their coffee shop if they are able to serve a cup of amazing coffee, even if it is far away. 

Dunkin Donuts entered India and their coffee, although not great, is okay. They are known for their donuts and they seem to be doing a decent job of it. The one chain I am really happy about entering India is Krispy Kreme. Their donuts are as unhealthy as they can get but they are damn delicious!

KFC is another chain that I am glad about, however, only for the fried chicken.Yes, it's unhealthy but they do make good fried chicken!

People complain that Indians don't understand, but they won't if they don't know better. People who travel, have tasted the best, they do know better. People who haven't traveled, show them what is better and they are smart enough to understand. Don't assume. More and more Indians are traveling around the world and getting to know more and more of international food. They will surely want to have it once in a while. And being a country of more than a billion people, even a few people coming to you once in a while is still quite a lot. But, the pricing needs to be right. Serve great food and at reasonable prices and there is no reason why there shouldn't be lines out the door, in a country where food such a huge pass-time.